Stillborn

In the second spring of our marriage, Jennifer and I were delighted to find out that she was pregnant. I was 34 at the time, and I was excited about going through the process of having a baby with Jennifer. We were full of hope and dreams of expanding our family. It was something that really gave us a sense of togetherness.

Then around the second or third month, her doctor noticed that something wasn't quite right. He sent Jennifer for an ultrasound which I supported her through. The radiology tech was very quiet as she did her work. There wasn't the normal excitement and the "picture taking" that I learned in later pregnancies are the "usual." I was puzzled at the look on her face.

Jen's doctor let us know (I think he called her with this, but I don't remember) that the ultrasound "couldn't locate the fetus." He wanted to take some bloodwork. So Jennifer went in for that. He then let her know that she was miscarrying the baby and let her know what to expect.

I was pretty upset about it. Jennifer was surprised that I was more upset than she was. There are some not-so-pretty aspects to miscarriage and to save Jennifer the trauma, I dealt with the aftermath of those. It was probably the first time in my life that I really felt God letting me experience the full force of death.

We did fine, and the situation wasn't like the title of this post in any way. There was no visible fetus to miscarry. Eventually pain was overtaken by healing. And then the next door neighbor to Jen's parents miscarried...and there then seemed to be purpose.

In the midst of this, I saw a statistic that said that 30% of pregnancies ended in miscarriage. I don't know what the source of that statistic is, but we have been very aware of pregnancies that are miscarried since then...and I find that statistic to be very reasonable.

I think of all of this as I am reading this from Jesus's discussion with Nicodemus:

^{John 3:5-8 The Message} Jesus said, "You're not listening. Let me say it again. Unless a person submits to this original creation--the "wind hovering over the water' creation, the invisible moving the visible, a baptism into a new life--it's not possible to enter God's kingdom. ⁶When you look at a baby, it's just that: a body you can look at and touch. But the person who takes shape within is formed by something you can't see and touch--the Spirit--and becomes a living spirit.

⁷"So don't be so surprised when I tell you that you have to be "born from above'--out of this world, so to speak. 8You know well enough how the wind blows this way and that. You hear it rustling through the trees, but you have no idea where it comes from or where it's headed next. That's the way it is with everyone "born from above' by the wind of God, the Spirit of God."

I don't know how this strikes you, but I think of it this way: 100% of us are stillborn spiritually according to Romans (Rom 3:23 NIV,Rom 5:12-14 NIV) . We come into this world with tremendous promise and hope, and we're absolutely dead to spiritual things. We must be born from above...reborn through God's Spirit into a life of spiritual awareness.

I'm not talking Eastern mysticism or gnostic mysteries. Jesus acted surprised that Nicodemus didn't get these things, but we're hardly better prepared to understand them even with the Holy Spirit interpreting them for us. The world around us is spiritually stillborn.

I imagine Heaven quietly watching as each new child is born. Perhaps the Father knows the spiritual destination of that child when it is born--either because he determines to woo the child or because of his all-knowing nature--but I somehow doubt that all of heaven knows the outcome then. They wait with bated breath for that moment in time...that Eureka!! That Ah-ha!! when the Spirit starts the process of rebirth for this new spirit and then it comes to a realization of its need for Jesus.

What happens if there is no midwife to deliver this spirit? What happens if no attending doctor is there to deliver it into spiritual understanding? Jesus said that we should pray for the harvest because the field is white and ready for harvest. We are called to deliver freshly awakened spirits into full spiritual understanding. Not just to the point of accepting Jesus and baptizing the person, but full spiritual understanding. That IS the Great Commission.

Why do I think that Heaven waits with bated breath? Because of the great chapter 15 in Luke of Parables of The Lost Sheep, Coin, and Sons. And because of this verse from that chapter:

^{Luke 15:7 The Message} Count on it--there's more joy in heaven over one sinner's rescued life than over ninety-nine good people in no need of rescue.

God has entrusted to us the life-delivering ministry of evangelism and discipleship...of midwiving and nurturing new Christians. I've heard the happiest nurses in hospitals are those that work in the delivery ward. I wonder how we get there spiritually?? Perhaps by searching the sides of the road and the bushes for any that will come?