Pedantics R Us

I'm going to poke fun at myself a little. As you can tell from my writing, I feel deep confidence in my ability to understand and to reason. Some people get tired of dealing with my constant desire for "gravitas" (can anyone actually take themselves seriously if they use that word??) I know that it creates a barrier between myself and others at times.

Perhaps who I am as a person is centrally wrong and many of the events that have happened to us are God's way of getting my attention to try and redirect me. Trust me that thought has occurred to me many times over the past several years.

Tonight I am confronting it again. From time to time, though, certain people in my life will actually see through and understand. They accept me for who I am rather than expecting me to be something different.

One of these people was a friend named Kim from Haltom High School. At the time she was dating the guy that would be my roommate my freshman year at Texas A&M. They seemed to have it together. She was a cheerleader type. He was a good looking football type. For some reason they liked me and we enjoyed sitting together in English and in French.

During English one day we were doing vocabulary sentences...you know...where the teacher gives you a word and you write a sentence about it. Kim wrote this about me as her sentence for the word pedantic:

At first, Greg seemed very pedantic, but as I have gotten to know him I realized he is genuinely intelligent.

If you feel that I am boasting with that sentence, please read it again. It isn't exactly pleasant to be told that--at first blush--you seem pedantic and fake. While I knew she meant it as a compliment and wasn't trying to hurt me when she wrote that, it REALLY stung. I remember smiling bravely while my head was swimming. I remember being very close to tears.

Thinking back to that today, I realize that sometimes the pedanticism is just a mask. I portray myself as smart and capable in order to be respected/accepted. But I also know that if I have to choose between the two, I have an easier time with being respected. Being accepted has always been a bit of a fool's errand in my opinion. And yet I SENSE that somehow that is essential to life...placing acceptance over the expectation of respect.

I write this knowing that some will be offended by it. Please trust me, gentle reader, that it is not intended to offend. It is an attempt to deal seriously with a part of me that I wonder about. And to expose that this is an area of real vulnerability for me. I simply don't KNOW at times how to handle this.

I'm sure we could all find some good bible verses that deal with it. God brought Luke 12:48 to my attention once and it is a private theme for me ever since:

^{Luke 12:47-48 NIV} "That servant who knows his master's will and does not get ready or does not do what his master wants will be beaten with many blows. ⁴⁸But the one who does not know and does things deserving punishment will be beaten with few blows. From everyone who has been given much, much will be demanded; and from the one who has been entrusted with much, much more will be asked.

The passage in context expresses a certain amount of exasperation with those who don't take spiritual things deeply seriously. And you can't miss the fact that in a red-letter Bible these letters are red...that is to say...Jesus spoke them.

Jesus' approach is often puzzling. On one hand he accepts Mary's worship while appearing to chastise Martha's diligence. On the other hand, he gets all over the disciples for their lack of SERIOUS faith...as in not casting out demons and not trusting God to carry them safely over rough waters. You get the feeling that trying to reduce life to a set of rules just doesn't please God. But you also get the feeling that not taking the rules seriously (aka LAW) also displeases him ("I come not to do away with the Law but that the Law will be fulfilled".)

So sometimes we dive into understanding and knowledge to try and figure out how to handle it. Iwas one of those kids who READ about Solomon's choice to pray for wisdom and immediately got on my knees and said "me too!!" I understood that meant--in order to be serious with God--asking for wisdom meant putting a priority on getting that and even completely rejecting the expectation of "riches" in this life. But as I look back at my life, I know a number of people that are very close to me who think of me as a spendthrift...someone who is focused on material goods. And no amount of arguing with them will change their minds!!

As I think through that, I realize the deep isolation that we all live in. Very few people get a clear glimpse of someone else. And if they see clearly, they may very well grasp hold of an incomplete picture of this unfinished work of art that God is completing. They might focus on the unfinished parts instead of the whole picture.

If you've ever seen a partially completed piece of art, you understand that longing for closure that evokes in you. It is VERY easy to reject artistic expression before it is realized or completed. It is also VERY easy to judge the finished piece based on its impact when it was incomplete. We actually stare at the change and attempt to judge whether the CHANGE was good or not!!

We're like that with people. We believe our own talent to critically look at another and to judge whether that person is being "expressed" by God in a pleasing fashion or not. I am guilty of this! Who isn't?? On the other hand, life really cannot be "anything goes." We have an obligation to stand in the gap and to oppose evil. How do we do both?

At the risk of oversimplifying, may I offer a one word answer:

Spiritually

Somehow our spirit must connect to their spirit. Both are unseen, but the spirit of the person IS knowable. We aren't there to judge that spirit. We are there to connect to it in deep, serious ways. Perhaps God will use us to guide the spiritual growth of another person, but we must realize both our personal limitations (dare I say shortcomings??) and God's ownership of the process of guiding growth.

The process of guiding a person to maturity is, perhaps, the ONE area in life where we are not stewards. We can ONLY be fellow pilgrims...companions in spiritual growth. We cannot and MUST not attempt to own another person's growth. Only God can truly own that.

But the sweetest thing in the world is to connect and to understand and to be understood. While Kim's sentence at first hurt me when I read it, my insecurity turned into sweet comfort when God whispered these words in my ears that day:

"She means it."

Getting past the gloss and the dross of everyday life requires spending time seeking out the spirit of the people around us. I honestly believe that our first step in personal evangelism should not be to share but to know the other person deeply. As we express our desire to know them, they will come to know us too...warts and all (frogiveness anyone???)

And as we reach that point of intimacy, trust builds, and we become fellow pilgrims...companions going alongside each other down the road. With the grace of God, we can live our lives visibly in such a way that our choices point ourselves and others towards heaven. Life on our own (under the sun, living outside of grace) is necessarily ungracious.

Isn't it beautiful that one of the Greek words for the Holy Spirit is "paraclete"? It literally means "one who comes alongside". God chooses to become a fellow pilgrim with us in our search for him if we will HONESTLY and FERVENTLY seek him. To do that is very simple but requires ALL that you are:

^{Romans 10:9-11 NIV} (That) if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. ¹⁰For it is with your heart that you believe and are justified, and it is with your mouth that you confess and are saved. ¹¹As the Scripture says, "Anyone who trusts in him will never be put to shame."

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Why does God hide?

I came at this indirectly in "Incomparable..." I closed with the "treasure in a field" and the "pearl of great price" analogies (they really aren't parables as much as metaphors...there really isn't a story and neither has an 'ending' per se.)

As I was riding into work this morning I happened to leave late enough to enjoy Chuck Swindoll's Insight for Living broadcast. He had a poignant message for those who have been through the Grinder. You can hear it today at insight.org.

Chuck addressed the crutches that we fall back on when we encounter hard times. He dealt very specifically with how people either rely on the crutches or they find/deepen their relationship with God. I can't present it the way he did, but they come to rely on God by throwing away the crutches.

As an aside, may I postulate that the ONLY reason we turn to these crutches in the first place is because God isn't in full sight? He is hiding from us? And the faith crises happen when we can't "sense" him?

Anyway, the specific crutches Chuck mentioned were:

Escapism--avoiding the pain of dealing with the problem through other activities, other relationships, drugs, or alcohol.

Cynicism--descending into sarcasm, cynicism, and eventually deep bitterness.

Humanism--rejecting biblical explanations and prescriptions for living in favor of human explanations.

Supernaturalism--turning to mysticism and mediums to find meaning/solutions for the problems.

To throw away those crutches requires putting the trust in something or someone else. Who is that someone?

If you are going through the Grinder and you really want to discover meaning and purpose, you eventually have to answer this question:

"Why am I here?"

The superficial, churchy answers quickly fail you. You are not here to attend church every Sunday, to teach a Sunday School class, or to do good works in the community. Those are good consequences to a deep faith, but they are not the CAUSE of faith and they aren't the BEST result of faith.

Otherwise, what does it mean when trouble happens? That IS the point of the book of Job...what is the meaning of trouble? We know from the book of Job that Job's failings did NOT cause his trouble. In fact, his trouble was the result of his faithfulness to God.

God invited Satan to trouble Job. Satan accepted the invitation not once but several times...inflicting progressively greater trouble on Job. Satan turned the screw until Job couldn't take it anymore. He tortured Job relationally, physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. Not one area of Job's life...as far as we can ascertain from scripture...was left intact. Nothing was spared.

You know...you can't skip the book of Job. God really did that and he really is like that. In order to accomplish an eternal result, he not only allows but is incited by Satan against his people:

^{Job 2:3}And the LORD said to Satan, "Have you considered my servant Job, that there is none like him on the earth, a blameless and upright man, who fears God and turns away from evil? He still holds fast his integrity, although you incited me against him to destroy him without reason."

You know what...I think Satan played directly into God's hands in the book of Job. God allowed Satan to incite Him against Job. And what was the result of that?

1. Job KNEW that this trouble had a supernatural cause. Very early Job accuses God of being behind the change from being blessed to being cursed. And the scripture says that Job did NOTHING wrong in saying that.

2. Job UNDERSTOOD that this wasn't about his unfaithfulness. Job opposed the accusations of his friends and God said that Job told the truth about God and God said the friends lied.

3. God REVEALED himself to Job in a direct fashion BECAUSE of the difficulty that Job endured. One of the most startling sections of scripture has man coming face to face with God and God asks some BLISTERING questions:

^{Job 38:1-11 NIV} Then the LORD answered Job out of the storm. He said:

² "Who is this that darkens my counsel
with words without knowledge?

³ Brace yourself like a man;
I will question you,
and you shall answer me.

⁴ "Where were you when I laid the earth's foundation?
Tell me, if you understand.

⁵ Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know!
Who stretched a measuring line across it?

⁶ On what were its footings set,
or who laid its cornerstone-

⁷ while the morning stars sang together
and all the angels ^[a] shouted for joy?

⁸ "Who shut up the sea behind doors
when it burst forth from the womb,

⁹ when I made the clouds its garment
and wrapped it in thick darkness,

¹⁰ when I fixed limits for it
and set its doors and bars in place,

¹¹ when I said, 'This far you may come and no farther;
here is where your proud waves halt'?

The 'chapterizers' of the Old Testament devoted two lengthy chapters to God's questions, and then in Chapter 40 we see this exchange:

^{Job 40:1-7 NIV} The LORD said to Job:

² "Will the one who contends with the Almighty correct him?
Let him who accuses God answer him!"

³ Then Job answered the LORD :

⁴ "I am unworthy—how can I reply to you?
I put my hand over my mouth.

⁵ I spoke once, but I have no answer—
twice, but I will say no more."

⁶ Then the LORD spoke to Job out of the storm:

⁷ "Brace yourself like a man;
I will question you,
and you shall answer me.

Then God continues through the rest of chapter 40 and all of 41 asking Job MORE questions!! Job stands up to all of this--which I suspect caused GREATER terror in him than ALL of his difficulty--until he is finally able to fully respond:

^{Job 42:1-7} Then Job replied to the LORD :

² "I know that you can do all things;
no plan of yours can be thwarted.

³ You asked, 'Who is this that obscures my counsel without knowledge?'
Surely I spoke of things I did not understand,
things too wonderful for me to know.

⁴ "You said, 'Listen now, and I will speak;
I will question you,
and you shall answer me.'

⁵ My ears had heard of you
but now my eyes have seen you.

⁶ Therefore I despise myself
and repent in dust and ashes."

So why do I think God hoodwinked Satan into attacking Job? What purpose might God have had in mind in doing this? Why would God put his servants through all of this?

I think God desired to reward Job with a deep understanding of who he really is. You know the kind of disucssion I'm talking about if you've ever dated. The one where you really, in truly just want to be honest with someone who loves you and know they accept you for who you are?

You know...that honest, gritty "relationship" discussion where we get it all out on the table where we humans hope we can tell all and be fully embraced and accepted? God seems to be doing that with Job. And look at Job's responses: "Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know" & "My ears had heard of you, but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes."

Sin puts us in a state where God is "too wonderful for me to know". When we see him with our eyes, "Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes."

Salvation is necessary not just so that we won't suffer eternal destruction. Salvation is necessary BECAUSE he desires us in his presence. Job was a RIGHTEOUS man according to the Bible. He was BLAMELESS in the things he said according to the Bible. God desires to relate to us...he desires for us to know him FULLY.

And the ONLY thing standing between us and knowing God fully is....sin. It is as if it is the sin that ignites when we are in God's presence and destroys us. Sin is like white phosphorus. It gets on (and under) our skin, ignites, and destroys us...ESPECIALLY when we are in the presence of the Living God.

So God hides!! And only fully reveals himself in special circumstances to special people. But has he ever revealed himself fully to us? Even more than in this conversation with Job? Or are we missing who he really is?

TO BE CONTINUED...

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Incomparable...

A consumer culture forces comparisons and choices on us. Every day we are assaulted with messages that--like children begging for money in any developing society--demand our attention.

The temptation is to present Christianity as a consumer choice. Reason suggests that we should put all of the world's religions on a shelf and pick and choose from each according to how each meets our own, personally perceived needs.

The deep flaw of consumerism is the selfishness and self-centeredness of the consumer. Nothing makes it clearer than when we make choices about what to buy. I'll be honest...I'm not immune to this. Even today I get upset if things aren't "just so". Serve me off-brand ketchup or green beans and I'm as likely as an 8-year-old to turn up my nose.

When I was younger--think mid-high school through college--I had a real issue with the claim that the genesis (small g, not the first book of the OT) of the Bible that we have is sufficiently trustworthy to treat the Bible in its entirety as infallible. And I used the potential fallibility of the text that WE have to essentially become a choosy consumer of doctrine. I picked what I liked and the rest...well...I didn't "trust it."

My dad influenced me against this position in several very specific conversations that I remember. Two of the most influential are:

1. The first was when he asked me the question...seemingly out of the blue...if I could express the difference between "trusting" and "obeying." At that time I was in my late teens so I'm sure I had some authority issues that were the source of the question...no doubt issues that I had expressed to him.

I thought about it and tried giving a definition that clearly differentiated the two concepts because, in my mind at least, they were different. He listened attentively as I defined each, and then he said, "when you get down to it, aren't they really the SAME thing??"

That provoked me to think about them and to try and harmonize the two in my mind as a single concept. Later in that conversation I responded back that they are essentially two faces of a single coin...the coin we call faith. You can't have faith without trusting and you aren't practicing your faith without obeying.

Both faces...while seemingly different...show something deeper.

2. The second time may have been before that conversation, but I believe it was after it. I was probably a student at Texas A&M when we had it. He was aware of my concerns about the accuracy of biblical text. Instead of defending it a la Josh McDowell's "Evidence that Demands a Verdict", he took a different approach.

I was reading about C.S. Lewis today at another blog and the author referred to C.S. Lewis using "abductive logic." This C.S. Lewis scholar explained it this way:

Lewis also utilized a form of logic known in philosophy as "abductive reasoning" in order to arrive at his conclusions regarding Christianity. Abductive reasoning, used in much scientific endeavor, appeals to the best explanation. This line of reasoning is clear in Lewis' argument from longing or desire. In Mere Christianity he writes, "If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world."

My dad used abductive logic when he offered this reasoning: if you view SOME of the biblical text as having an untrustworthy genesis, how do you choose which part to believe and which part to reject? Aren't you essentially putting yourself in God's shoes to try to do that? And if any part of the Bible is unreliable, doesn't that put us in the position of not being able to trust any of it?

You know that sound that Astro makes on the Jetsons when something catches his attention and he knows something bad is about to happen??? "Rut-roh" When my dad expressed this to me, it really caught my attention. Wasn't I failing to trust God by failing to accept the Bible as his reliable self-revelation? After all, what more reliable story of God and of Jesus do we have than the Bible? If we don't share this common expression of revelation, aren't we left to each person judging God and interpreting God through his or her own eyes?

Said differently--and hardly originally since others have thought and said this before--if there is no absolute truth...specifically if the text of the Bible is not reliable...then am I not free to believe whatever I choose and it really is irrelevant WHAT I believe?

I'll take you a moment to sift through my two conversations with my dad for just a moment before you answer that. Let me remind you of some of my credentials: I am trained as a scientist. I have a American Chemical Society-recognized Bachelor of Science in Chemistry from Texas A&M University. For over 20 years I have worked with computers using extremely specific mathematics-based languages in order to control the operation of machines. I have lived and breathed formal logic since high school.

It isn't through formal logic or human reason that I came to know Jesus Christ. In fact I will argue that both the narrower topic of formal logic and the broader topic of human reason are very restrictive in what they can "discover." Both are limited to the axioms that you start with. If you start with an under-the-sun, natural philosophy--as the author of Ecclesiastes tried to do--you end up with life having no unifying vision, purpose, or satisfaction.

The DESIRE for purpose and satisfaction--according to C.S. Lewis's "abductive logic"--suggests that we are indeed made for something that isn't here. Not only that, but it suggests that what we will experience THEN doesn't in any way COMPARE to what we experience NOW.

I'll be honest with you...as much as I love this world and have come to appreciate both the visible and the invisible parts of it...I'm glad it doesn't compare to what comes next. I'll tell you why as simply as I know how...

I don't want there to be a sense of choosing or of losing when we transition from HERE to THERE...from NOW to THEN. I hope that even my memories are redeemed through the process of transfiguration. That I am able to fully see and understand what that which today causes me deep disappointment and frustration.

Paul referred to it as seeing through a glass darkly. Some scholars even believe the thorn in the side that he refers to is recurring blindness or even extreme myopia in part because of his reference to seeing darkly. But he goes on to say:

^{1 Cor 13:12 KV (link to whole chapter)} For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known.

I have a theory why life works this way. God is incomparable. And consuming is about choosing. God knows once we have seen him face to face that we no longer are choosing...we KNOW. Just like Isaac took Rebecca into his tent and KNEW her, when we see God face to face we will KNOW him. Once we know him there is no longer a choice...the outcome is forced.

So he hides and gives us both indirect hints and direct revelation. We play hide and seek with him searching for--if you will--the marvelous, incomparable intelligence that unifies creation. He gives us a treasure hunt to see if...given a hint of treasure...we will search out the source of treasure rather than being satisfied with just the treasure itself.

My prooftext?

^{Matthew 13:44-46 NIV} "The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field. When a man found it, he hid it again, and then in his joy went and sold all he had and bought that field.

⁴⁵"Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant looking for fine pearls. ⁴⁶When he found one of great value, he went away and sold everything he had and bought it.

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Frogiveness

Go back...read it again. I spelled it that way on purpose. FROGiveness.

I hit the keys on the wrong order the other day, and when I read what I wrote, I started laughing out loud. It wasn't one of those soft chuckles. No, I didn't giggle. I laughed. I LAUGHED.

Why did I laugh so hard at the thought of FROGiveness? Let me set the stage for you:

You've heard this story before: a princess meets a frog, kisses him, and he turns into a prince. We all smile when the eyes of young children grow as big as saucers as they hear this story for the first time. The difference between a child and an adult is the child BELIEVES the fairy tale. The frog REALLY TURNS into a prince in the mind's eye of a child. For a grownup it is just a story...evoking pleasant memories of childhood...but still just a story.

Isn't salvation exactly like that story? Jesus--the bridegroom...the Prince--finds a frog. Except the frog is pretty sure that she is important and lovely. Jesus lovingly kisses us, and we turn from frogs into real people with spirits that are alive and free FOR THE FIRST TIME. Before that we have the spirits of frogs...

And in order for this fairy tale to come true in our lives, we must BELIEVE it as if we are children. We must cast off the cynicism and stoicism of adulthood and regain our ability to FULLY put our trust in someone that PROMISES deliverance.

Why have we become so cynical? Snake-oil salesmen. They promise what they can't deliver. We put our heart into believing and are disappointed over and over and over again. The king of snake-oil salesmen is the head snake Satan. You might recognize him au naturel in the Garden of Eden. He's there. Selling snake oil. "YOU can be LIKE GOD if you ONLY eat of THIS FRUIT (and rebel against God.)"

That's the snake-oil salesman's patter: do this and achieve power and glory and honor (by denying God's power and glory and honor.) We try it. We never find what we're looking for in it. We are disappointed at spending our $1.99 to find the MEANING of life!! We know it has to cost SOMETHING to find it, but we're cheap, so we're not going to pay very much after all. We want the shortcut. We want the easy answer.

But God isn't a snake-oil salesman. In fact, he really isn't into selling at all. He expects US to seek HIM out. And he wants us to do it with our whole hearts...with EVERYTHING that we have.

And when we do, the story goes something like this:

You've left the lilypad to go on a search for that something that you know you're missing. You look high and low under EVERY branch and along EVERY path. You find data--information--that suggests that it all makes sense and all hangs together. Your heart longs to find the meaning and the purpose to life.

You're hopping along one day and another frog says: "Hey, I've been where you are and I would like to introduce you to someone that can help you with finding meaning. In fact, if you get to know him he will change your life." You've heard the story about the princess and the frog and you wonder, IS IT TRUE?

So you go along with this frog and you come upon an Alice-in-Wonderland-style mushroom with frogs gathered all around. Your friend says, "He's over there, can't you see him?"

You look and you're frustrated because he seems to be hidden behind other frogs. You can't see that awesome Prince that you envision in your mind. You know...the one that stands head and shoulders above the rest, has smooth skin, long dark hair, a beard, and stands in flowing robes.

Then the crowd parts and you SEE him. But...wait...he isn't what you expected. He isn't much to look at. He's kind of short...in fact...compared to your mental picture of the Prince...he's disappointingly short. His skin is indeed smooth, but not for the reason that you imagined. You see...he's a frog, too.

Your mind starts to reel: "The Prince is a frog? How can that be? And if he is a frog, then what happens when...well...he kisses me? What do I turn into now?"

Thinking of the snake that tried to sell you some magical "Amphibious Skin Smoother" last week, you start to turn away and head out. Maybe the promise of meaning is a farce. Maybe our greatest hopes are pointless.

Then it happens...he looks at you...says your name. And you KNOW there is something different about this frog. He asks you if you have ever experienced FROGiveness in your life. You honestly don't know what that is so you say, "no".

Then he startles you: "You can only experience FROGiveness if you give up your search for meaning and replace it with knowing ME. If you will do that, I will FROGive you and your life will be filled to overflowing."

"What? But my search for meaning is all I am," you think. "How can I replace it with anything less than bountiful knowledge or beautiful art or wonderful music?"

"How can I find meaning and purpose in knowing a FROG? And what happens to my hope of leaving frogness behind and becoming something else?? When will I be kissed and change just like in the fairy tales?"

But...but...there is something about him. You know that what's on the inside of him is different even if the outside looks like all the other frogs...maybe even worse...you know he isn't even that handsome!!

So you answer, "I don't even know what FROGiveness is...how can you FROGive me?"

And he smiles lovingly, walks over to you, and puts his head on top of your head and kisses you...and then you know!! FROGiveness is God accepting exactly who you are...warts and all...in order that you might know exactly who he is in all of his glory.

And it's called FROGiveness because God knew that in order for FROGS to accept FROGiveness, it had to come from someone a LOT like them. And in that moment you realize that God is more than you can ever imagine and you know that you will never know all there is to know about him no matter how much you search.

You also know you WILL search and you WILL discover him. And in doing that the purpose of being a frog will become both obvious and completed. And that only through FROGiveness could you EVER have known all of that!

So I ask you...gentle reader...have you experienced FROGiveness? Have you turned your life over to God exactly the way you are? And in doing so have you asked him to reveal himself to you? And is he doing that right now as you read this story?

God is waiting to come alive for you like you have never imagined. He is getting ready to pierce the veil and break through and you will see him in ALL of his glory. But for right now we have to search with ALL of our heart to know him. Isn't the promise of meaning (not to mention sharing his glory) worth it? Won't you ask for FROGiveness from him today?

;)

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The presence of greatness

We MKs of Indonesia--the missionary kids whose parents planted families in that exotic place--have a hidden fondness for a place near Mt. Merapi in Central Java. I don't remember the Indonesian name for the encampment, but I remember the name we gave it: Camp MiKi.

The founder of Camp Miki is Catherine Walker. She was a single woman who answered God's call to missions. If you have heard of Disciple's Prayer Life: Walking in Fellowship with God, she is the co-author of that study. She was not much older when we were in Indonesia than I am now. She decided--her story--that the MKs should have a special experience each summer filled with spiritual learning and fun. She also wanted the parents to have a break at the end of the parent-led home schooling that most mission stations used.

Indonesia is an exotic place filled with life. When you think of the word "rainforest", unless you have seen one your concept of it might be something static. As I've posted before, there is a battle for the land between the kotas (towns/cities), desas (villages), rice paddies, and the forest. Every inhabitant joins the battle every day. About mid-day the rains tend to come and revive the forest and keep the paddies full.

We would take the train to Camp Miki. My first summer we rode from Bandung. The second summer we rode from Madiun (through Solo..I'm pretty sure Brent and Melissa joined Jeff, Jason, and myself.) At Camp Miki there was a central lodge with a screened in area where we all met. Then the campers whent to their own cabins.

We had scriptures to memorize before arriving. And we banded together in tribes when we got there. The Cheyenne were the younger campers (grades 1-3). The Cherokee were the middle campers (grades 4-6). Comanches were the oldest...the junior high age. The Counselors were missionaries. The Counselors In Training were the high schoolers who had graduated from Camp Miki in past years.

Aunt Catherine...we called the other missionaries "Aunt" and "Uncle" in order to promote a sense of family...designed all of this and led it herself. She always worked through a Camp Director. I remember Johnny Norwood was the Camp Director one of the two years that I went.

There were Bible Drills, Memorization Drills, and sports. But all of it was compressed into two weeks. We went swimming and hiking. I remember Jana Sanders having a broken ankle one year and being carried by Vance Worten. It's odd the things that come back when you think about things like this.

I learned to make a bed with "hospital corners" at Camp Miki and how to make a quarter bounce off of it. Each meal there were campers assigned to doing dishes. I remember feeling flustered when I was assigned to do the dishes with the eldest daughter of the Beck family...a family my parents had known in College.

I wrestled with Brad Beevers one year on the starting day of camp and was frustrated when he scissors-locked me with his leg when I was pretty sure I was stronger. In the second year I thought I would be chosen as a "Little Chief", but was disappointed when that didn't happen. That was one of my first experiences with dealing with the Holy Spirit when he chooses someone else. I knew the ones that were chosen were chosen for a good reason...and not just because the missionaries leading the camp were deciding. Steve and his wife Connie now serve as missionaries.

"Aunt" Catherine was one of many single missionaries that served in Indonesia. Most were women, but one, John Tatum, was memorable to me because of his very dry wit. I learned recently that another, Mary Alice Ditsworth, recently lost all of her possesions due to Hurricane Katrina. The extended Indonesian mission family was banding together to reach out to her and to help her. Some were medical doctors and nurses.

I have a great affection for the women especially. While they never discussed it in these terms, the calling replaced things like marriage and families. I believe in my heart that Camp Miki served a far greater purpose in the lives of us MKs than Aunt Catherine could ever have accomplished by 'merely' being a housewife and raising her own children. To me her sacrifice was a noble and worth one and one that continues to impact my life as I seek to raise my own children. I enjoy the impact of AWANAs on my children because it reminds me of Camp Miki, for instance.

Of course, it gave me great private pleasure after I was married to Jennifer to lead a session teaching PrayerLife that included my wife...in part because it allowed me to share about someone who I loved very much with my new bride. So even many years after Camp Miki, Aunt Catherine still was impacting my life.

I write about her for one very simple reason. Greatness comes from the willingness to live in the absolute center of God's Will. I doubt that Aunt Catherine was trying as she conceived of Camp Miki to have a "lifelong impact". But because she was prompted and because she obeyed, I remember her best of those single missionaries...and I remember all of them BECAUSE of her.

There is a formula in the Bible, of course, for considering and seeking greatness. It's one we should all consider every day:

^{Matthew 20:25-28 NIV} Jesus called them together and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them. ²⁶Not so with you. Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, ²⁷and whoever wants to be first must be your slave— ²⁸just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."

If you happen to think of someone that has had this kind of impact on your life, perhaps now would be a good time to thank them? I took the opportunity to send a thank you email to Aunt Catherine after Brent shared her email address with me.

I entitled it "A Bouquet of Appreciation." I was pleasantly surprised when she acknowledge it with a phone call. Something tells me that it really touched her to have confirmed that her sacrifice--to become the servant to the children of missionaries--was purposeful.

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